|
aledawithwings
|
read my profile
sign my guestbook
Name: Nikki
Birthday: 8/20/1983
Gender: Female
Interests: The exploration of Buffalonian life, poetry, love, autumn, holidays, my guitar, Stella Artois the Kitten, long baths in my awesome tub, tea, herbal remedies, and a faith bigger than me.
Occupation: nonprofit
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  encounteryg
Member Since:
10/13/2004
|
|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| Been Almost a MonthGotta be honest, being ditched by all my xanga friends has made it easier to forget this page exists.
I have a real post that has been brewing for a long time. However, I currently lack the time or dedication.
Next week. Hang tight. | | |
| Hi friends,
Not much happening around these parts these days.
Mark and I have been making friends with this couple who we would never have guessed we'd like so much, which is so cool- we need more friends.
I started talking to my pastor about youth ministry options at our church and within 15 minutes became very very nervous. ( I think I have commitment issues!) It has taken me over two years to get to the place of possibly going back into ministry of any kind. I go to one the most liberal churches I've ever been to now, and love every minute of it, but I think I've learned that politics and expectations seem to be a part of every church, no matter how conservative or liberal. What I have found though is that in my liberal church people seem more mature, more ready to talk things out, more interested in true communication. (and as a side note, are better educated at higher quality schools)
I think the journey of my healing from past church injuries will probably need to bring me back to church ministry. I hope this experience is much more health-ful than my last. And I think it's beginning stages have been truly smart and that the first steps were very cautious and thoughtful.
In the mean time, I've been excited to read your thoughts on faith, peace, forgiveness, politics, etc. And I'm sorry not to have posted much. I am working on something in my back left lobe that should be mind blowing when it hits the web.
| | |
| adulthood.Does it seem to anyone else that doing something that doesn't naturally spring from the center of your soul for 40 hours every week just to pay to have electric is horrific and wrong? A crime against humanity even?
My ED suggested yesterday that I do more administrative work and (choke!) budget for the project I work on.
Now, I've typically taken on quite a bit of administrative stuff when it was needed, especially things I could view as big-picture "projects". But this new transition to me handling all left undone administratively... I actually don't think I can stomach.
I love my project and all it stands for, but I also understand my personality quite well and know that I need people and opportunities at creativity and brainstorming and project-goals and big picture stuff in order to feel happy and achieved at the end of each day. I am worried about how this will affect my ability to feel 100% there. I mean sometimes I guess we just muscle though things, but I don't think that that's the way to live 40 hours a week.
The good news is that, as I'm still healing, it would be quite nice to be able to work from home a bit and do some of this form developing etc, that I've been and will be working on. But whenever I do that I always worry that my immediate supervisory type person feels that I'm not being industrious, since she's pretty old school. I'm ready to be better, but I'm just not there, so obvious work to do outside of office would be quite nice, since I do a lot that doesn't show obvious immediate results all the time. Yet it has panned out to be quite a strong program because of those efforts and their "harvest" later on.
Urgh, adult life.
| | |
| rainy days. It's been a bit since I posted.
I'll be honest, the lack of peeps still using xanga makes me feel like that awkward moment at a party when you realize everyone else suddenly stopped talking but your still talking really loud as if to talk over them.
I have decided that a second stage should be added to developmental psychology that should be called second adolescence. It would cover that awkward time post-college post-marriage and post-first-career where you are depressed about the prospect of growing up on someone else's terms. It would explain the quarter-life-crisis that keeps coming up in friends lives. And it would explain the difficulty so many have transitioning from college to real actual life. I have a bunch of friends who decided to all move to the same city and avoid this process entirely by making sure all their needs are met by each other exclusively and by staying only in temp jobs.
They are all marrying each other now and considering moving away. I don't think most will.
Does anyone else feel like that is a big friggen cop-out?
| | |
| Mark and I had this awesome experience on this marriage retreat type thing this weekend. It was truly beautiful, I feel more in love than I did when we met. So... now I'm that much more vulnerable, which makes me nervous. But I'm also quite ecstatic about the whole thing.
Other recent developments include Mark's beer being almost ready to bottle!
We are thinking of having a ceremony to renew our vows come fall, more like how we had wanted the wedding to be in the first place and at our new church- to invite them into that decision we are making.
I'm also considering resigning from yoga-teacher-training until at least the fall. The trouble is, that means resigning from taking yoga there. But in honesty- I feel so exhausted and am still in so much pain from the accident that it almost makes more sense for me to only go to the free class I started in and the class on Thursdays at my gym.
I've also begun co-teaching a class to drug addicts in recovery, which I may need to give up. I'm wiped. And the commitment is at least an extra ten hours a week on what I am already doing. My only out has been that I am still not feeling healed and suffer greatly after attending a class. Sigh.
Americans are so busy. This week is so exhausting, this one happening now.
We sold a ton of stuff on ebay- mostly stuff we got for free or no longer use. The sad item to go is my awesome Epiphone Les Paul Custom. She is the essence of beauty, though still an epiphone, making her not the guitar of my dreams exactly, but pretty close. It did pay the rent this month, though. And car insurance.
Mark did replace his lost job with a temp job he seems to enjoy. I am hoping for something more permanent to open up, but his schedule now is almost exact to mine, making this the first time during our marriage that we will be able to regularly spend every weekend together.
Love!
| | |
|
